When People That Suck Are Smart

It’s actually quite a bummer of a story.

See, for about two weeks now my mom and I have been debating whether we should go to my grandmother’s (2nd?) memorial up in upstate NY, because all the family that couldn’t go to the last one are coming to this one, and that’s when they’ll be burying her ashes in the family plot.

So, we’ve all been back and forth about this for a while, because 1) It is a long-ass drive. Long and horrible. And I still don’t have my permit, which means I can’t help.

2) We’d only be going for > 24 hours. Literally, we’d get there in time to see everyone, see the service, and then have to drive back up again. The reason for this is we’d be leaving Friday night, or leave very early Saturday morning (the service is that evening), then have to pack up and leave Sunday because I have to catch a flight to St. Louis for my cancer camp on Monday. Luckily I’m packed for that, so I can pick up my suitcase and go the next morning.

3) I might not see very many of these people for a very long time. Either that, or they will die before doing so. See, there’s a huge generation gap with all the relatives up north, and there is a small crowd just becoming legal to drink, and then everyone else is 70+ and dying of lung cancer. I am not kidding. So I really think getting in the time now would be good.

Actually, I might go get my permit today after physical therapy if I have time.

Grandma & I



Philosophical Reflection of the Day:

I’ve noticed with more of the people around me, that the more they talk, the less comfortable they were with whatever came before it. As if everything needs clarification; everything needs closure. Or people just don’t think before they speak.


“Actual happiness always looks pretty squalid in comparison with the overcompensations for misery. And, of course, stability isn’t nearly so spectacular as instability. And being contented has none of the glamour of a good fight against misfortune, none of the picturesqueness of a struggle with temptation, or a fatal overthrow by passion or doubt. Happiness is never grand.”
― Aldous Huxley, Brave New World

In lieu of me rereading BNW

Why You Must Take Good Facebook Photos

I can give a perfect explanation of a scenario in which it would have been much more helpful for someone else to take a decent Facebook photo (selfie, as otherwise known), for the benefit of the public.

See, there’s this boy that’s pretty cute. Like, an 8. And he’s gonna be a senior next year. He was in my Latin class last year, so my friend Matt knows who he is, but didn’t know what he looks like.

The problem is Matt has now moved to Australia. It is very hard for me to send pictures via Skype, so if there were ever something I wanted to show him, he usually looks it up himself (also for clarity). NOW, the problem at hand was that the boy in question has a Facebook account, but is in exclusively group shots where he is completely not focused on looking attractive in any form.

So when Matt found this person on Facebook, about a day later (Australia has an 11-hour time difference), he just wrote back:

“I give him a 4.”



Going to see my dad for the weekend. He’s being weird. Like, he’s happy. Either he met a girl or he actually has lung cancer. I have mixed feelings about this.

My roommate’s still being a c^nt. I think I might kill her soon. Mom aid she’ll kick her ass out this weekend, but she’s gone soft on her all summer so I doubt it. Apparently not having a job wasn’t okay with Kathleen but with this chick, it’s cool because jobs aren’t just lying around.

Oh, and I finally found a copy of Brave New World at the secondhand bookstore I go to. Cost me more than it’s really worth ‘cuz it was on the bestseller list, but I could never find a copy at B & N, so I’d practically given up hope of ever seeing it again in print.

Oh, and I really wanna go see that Lucy movie. Dying to know if it’s any good.

Have a good weekend!

7/21 Radiate Episode 1 Part 2

Proton Therapy

Proton therapy and how it works- and why it just might save your life. Don’t worry, I’m almost done sulking, then I’ll go right back to not giving a shit and doing heroin like before.

I just had to sulk a little. I even told the Facebook group I’m part of that I had no idea what type of radiation to get- this is a breakthrough for me!

7/21 Radiate Episode 1

I told this really horrible joke to the resident (who, it being July and he was just transferred in from school, only looked 14), about all the cool kids with astrocytoma always picking on me, and I thought he pissed himself. I thought it was fairly clever myself. My mom didn’t. Se was a little busy channeling the inner Sarah Burnhardt over there.

BTW, radiation’s probably gonna be in the works. There’s a good clinic up in Philly we’re gonna drive up and see (already have an appt), to get another opinion on what kind of radiation to get, but it seemed like all in all, most of the people we saw and my general team of doctors are in favor of me doing something about this sooner rather than later. Especially while I’m under that golden 25, and my brain’s not done growing.

I really like this doctor, first off. He really advocated me getting other opinions, and not just hearing what he had to say about his specialty. I respected his opinions on everything a lot, but he also really seemed to understand that I’ve been dealing with this BS for 14 years now, and even if I have to deal with it for a lot longer, I’d appreciate it if that waiting game wasn’t Manhunt.